Monday, 7 May 2012
Dealing With Homosexuality : Fioravandi Pietro Fleming
Being
Gay is a journey that has been destined for you even prior to your
birth, Its is not something you can go out and purchase over a counter
or stand under the stars on a starry night and make a wish by saying..."
I wish to be gay".
For me it has been an incredible journey
with many pitfalls but it was entirely up to me to stand by whom I am
and above all believe in who I am. It is vitally important for all of us
to realize that nobody but nobody can bring you happiness and
contentment but YOU!!! From a very tender age I realized that I had
different feelings within my in comparison to the other boys in our
neighborhood. I wanted to do entirely different things to them. This ,
of course, in self posed a problem. Hence, i moved into a world of
fantasy whereby I could lose myself and be "happy". This spared me
insults and nastiness from my friends. Living in the real world at that
age was already difficult.
In my adolescent years the struggle
started. My siblings realized that their brother was different and
started avoiding me. Tears became my everyday companion and I must admit
gave me tons of relief. My high school years were absolutely hell!!!! I
was the outcast in more ways than...but this did not deter me from
being whom I am. I was stoned (and it hurt more emotionally than it did
physically). Looking back, today I can smile because at the end of the
day I did not betray myself. I pushed through to the bitter end.
I got engaged in my early twenties when I started my Nursing career.
This was to blend in with the rest of society. I in actual fact I was
running away from the truth because I was in a new city where no-one
knew me. That year of being engaged was hell, not for her but for me. I
was living a lie and that did not rest well with me at all. Not going
into great detail the engagement ended and I could sigh with relief...I
was free from my lies. There is a saying in the English
language......THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE" Boy It surely did it for me.
To this day i am still on very good terms with her. That is indeed a
Bonus for me. The drama with my family was lengthy and very bitter. That
is is story on its own!!! I endured their insults, beatings as well,
from time to time. I still would not budge..".I AM GAY". I was cursed,
avoided, slandered...yet I bore my cross with a smile. "To Him who
waits. it shall be given" My wait for acceptance was long and
tedious....but it eventually arrived . Today my entire family loves me
for whom I am and my perseverance. Having a relationship in the gay
world is no different to the straight world, a relationship between two
people, irrespective of their sexual orientation is a way of life and
presents with every day problems e.g. the insecurities, jealousy,
betrayal, nastiness etc. I learnt vastly from my relationships( had one
for 8 years and for 18 years). My gay relationships gave me a sense of
belonging, a sense of responsibility, and the experience of being loved.
Today I am at peace and very content. I refuse to be a bitter person
because of the manner of how I was treated as a Gay man. We have walked a
long difficult road so that the younger generation can live is a
society where there is no discrimination between the sexual orientation
of people.
Shakespeare clearly stated" And above all things
unto thine own self be TRUE". Have the determination to believe in
yourself irrespective of the hassles society places on you. My tale is
one of many that is known to many other gay men and I know they will
identify identify with me.
For all my bitter experiences I have a broad smile on my face and can say"The journey was worth my persecution!!!!
- Fioravandi Pietro Fleming
Dealing With Homosexuality : Roy Adi
Homosexuality........!!!!!!!
homosexuality means to have attraction towards the same sex. is it
wrong ? if yes so why it is wrong ? i don't think that it is wrong. love
is like a bird. it can fly in the sky any where. with his own friends
or with other animals and many more. i mean to say that love is blind it
could be with an one weather with the same sex or with the
other sex. when a baby is in his mothers womb the mother loves him/her
instead of knowing weather it is a male or female or gay or anything
else. that is love. i don't think being homosexual is a crime we all are
also human beings so why the society discriminates us ? why we are
afraid of telling it to any one ? why? why? why?
this is not fare at all....
Dealing with homosexuality is a topic which seriously does not have any
end. its an endless topic and its very difficult too. a person who is a
man but loves a man........!!
Such a great topic to gossip for
others. nobody thinks what he is feeling. nobody wants to keep himself
at his place and think according to him. nobody is with him. finally it
results in depression, loneliness,lack of self confidence etc. but why ?
because the world is full of ego. of any 1 is two steps ahead of him he
will pull down him by doing any thing. without thinking what will be
its result. i am the live example of it. when people wants anything from
it i do everything for them but when it is my turn they show me a huge
thumb. in the race when ii am with them then its fine but when i am 2
steps ahead they pull me down by abusing me or making fun of my
homosexuality. its a very difficult task to be a homosexual person. just
hiding the matter that i am homosexual from the world is too difficult.
in every moment, in every path of life i have to suffer with the
abusing of others, suckling words, shamefulness and all. but on the
other hand little little moments i love to keep which gives me respects.
a life of dignity, one more chance to explore the world, one more
chance to live. hmmmmm at the same time its very difficult to share your
feelings to any one, to get a life partner. and if i got then again a
problem.... if anyone came to know about what will happen ? how would be
i able to stay in the society ? people would laugh at me....!!! why
society....?? its my life society will not live it . why they want to
kill my dreams ? why the society don't want to accept it ? society
society society........!!!!!! this is the matter.
so at last i
jst want to say that it is really very difficult to be homosexual.
there is a line in hindi " bhagvan ne jo b is duniya m bnaya hai soch
smjh kr hi bnaya hai " then why we are not accepting the creation of
god.
thank u all for reading.......
luv u we 4 u.........
- Roy Adi
Dealing With Homosexuality : Ved Roy
Homosexual/gay/story/incident/
from the time I read about the topic on the wall of WE4YOU,am thinking on it from then.I asked Arnab -"what should I write".He told me -"whatever you want to". What does it mean- I said to myself and I again read the post"the
article should be short". Short well this topic is so diverse and complex, if I would write a novel on it,that also would not justify the topic.
So I thought why not think "Out of box" and I ran to mother and asked how she deals with us. She said chopping the vegetables as god with little devils.Then I
called my friend and asked how he deals with his girlfriend.He said -"as Manmohan Singh deals with Mamta and other allies",I thought I touched the wrong chord so I disconnected the line.So here I am more confused than earlier how I deal with my homosexuality. Should I scream on road/or bang
my head or do what.Is it a bad luck...that I am homosexual.I am a lonely guy,I want somebody to love,I am so depressed.Then suddenly my mother came and switch on the light come outside see a baby bird is doing something.I came out and see a baby bird just out of shell trying to fly and repeatedly was falling down from branch and was trying again.At the same time I realized is not am in same situation also trying to deal with my homosexuality.But hey do I have to deal with it.I mean
that small bird also know it has to learn to fly and I also have to
learn to make it a part of my life.Then why think on it which is of no
use.Does my homosexuality help me if I dont perform in my work/or is it
a hindrance if i travel on road.NO nobody cares for it.
Millions walk on earth and nobody has time to see you are homosexual or not.Then why I have to deal with it.Like my body features its part of my life.I cannot do away with it,so its fine.I am not walking with written on my head am a sad homosexual.Why should I ?
So am not dealing with but am living
with it my indefinite dreams of my life.I know its not clear but hey
friends in life its not necessary to be every time clear.Like I said its
my life and I am living with it.
- Ved Roy
Dealing With Homosexuality : Jim Clifford
I
did everything in my life, as a good boy, and after high school went to
college and made 99% marks. As I said, I did everything very well but
tackle the thought of my sexuality. I excelled in everything I had
done, even took 4 years of private lessons in songwriting and music
theory from a magnificent teacher... I still write and play today....
I felt I knew nothing about my sexuality. Though in my subconscious I
knew something was different. I did not want to be exculpated from
those around me...... So I did everything else I could in my life,
tackling every aspect except my sexuality...
So I became a good songwriter, I graduated college, and entered my career, and then it happened.
I was in my neighborhood supermarket, in the produce section, imagine
that, of course, and Ronny came up to me and asked may I help you? We
engaged in a simple nice conversation, he asked if I would have lunch. I
said Yes. I lived two blocks away, we had a nice luncheon in my
apartment, and he left back to work. Then I noticed he left his jacket.
A day later, he called and said "I left my jacket, may I come and pick it up?"
He then asked me if I would like to go out with him.... I said yes.... not knowing what to expect.
In those days, the gay clubs were exclusive and members only, and he
took me to every club in West Hollywood. We danced, we had a good time,
it was bliss.
Then it happened that we made love one night,
and it was heaven, my first time... oh I fell in love that night.... no
details needed here, just to say it was heaven....
I
immediately called my family and friends and said I was in love, and the
response was yes, with whom? I said with a BOY named Ronny. Oh? Mama
said she always knew, she loved me and she loved me and always wanted
me to be happy. Sister had a lot of questions... my brother had no
questions just said he loved me... my other sister said I know my dear
brother, I love you.
We had a torrid love affair for three
months. Ronny took me to all the best clubs, and I was so excited to be
in these places, it was so comfortable... so many kinds of people,
every ethnicity, every culture and guys from many countries... yet all I
could see is that they were all gay... my people....!
Three
months, it ended. I was devastated. I cried, walking home for 2 miles
in the rain... I was crying hard, but the rain hid my tears..... I was
so crushed.... I cried the whole night....
The days passed, and
I was able to go to the clubs Ronny invited me to, and I met new
friends who were gay. I had not known a gay person before Ronny. The
music was wonderful, I met new friends, and I felt my life had finally
started....
I never thought I was in the closet as I had
announced to my family and friends as soon as I had my first boyfriend.
I lost half my friends. No matter here... I kept all of my family.
From then I have felt forever free, to be myself, my family and
remaining friends loved me, no matter how I was, for I was born this
way....
I did meet up with Ronny again, and we had remained
good friends for many years until he moved away.... there were no bad
feelings, only a love of friendship.... and in my heart I have always
been thankful for his love and friendship with me...
It's been a
long journey, it did not happen overnight, but it took years for me to
be comfortable to say YES I AM GAY... and please,my family, if you have
to vote on gay marriage, think of me, your sweet cousin, nephew,
grandson, son, I AM GAY, think of me and think of how I want to live my
life.... FREEEEEEEEEEE.... free to marry the one I love.... free to be
me........
Now years ahead, my family loves me dearly and I am
the favored "son" though my mama and grandma are in heaven. I am still
the favored one.... they love me dearly... and they wish the most
happiness for me... to find my love and to live my life with abandonment
of conventions and love freely... and now at my age I have found my
true love after all these years that I have waited....for so very long,
for the one.... and finally I am free....
Bless all my
brothers... I love you all dearly... keep the faith, keep true to your
values and wishes... your desire for true love... for it will happen...
- Jim Clifford
Dealing With Homosexuality : Aakash Oberoi
Homosexuality is not a new phenomenon and has been rejected by Islam
and other world religions as a perversion and a sin. Yet whereas in the
past those who practiced homosexuality had mostly been either silent or
marginalized, today we have gained wider acceptance and vocal support
mostly due to sustained campaigning by gay rights groups to enhance
their image and spread their appeal.
When we are covering topic of
Dealing with Homosexuality so I’d like to directly go into the bulk that
is ‘Dealing with it’ rather than stating more on what is homosexuality
and other related issues. It’s more like an advisory article which will
let you know how to deal with it.
It has two aspects of dealing. One
is homosexual’s dealing with himself and second is, heterosexuals
dealing with homosexuality. I’ll cover both the aspects.
1] Dealing with YourSelf as Queer:
People say it’s unfortunate, If you are thinking you are less or bad
then don’t expect from others any appreciation or even good thoughts
about you and it’s happening in whole world not just in India or others
Asian countries. You respect yourself first! What do you mean by being
fortunate? – being rich and having respect. If yes then Okkaay! But by
being gay you can have that…Prove yourself! (Sleepovers and ‘ASL’s chat
won’t contribute you anything)
Tim Cook, Apple’s New CEO is the Most Powerful Gay Man in America (It means in World somehow)
Whatever is responsible for making someone gay, bi or straight – THAT’S JUST THE WAY THEY ARE!
“I do believe that I was born with my homosexuality, and I'm fine with
that! A lot of people think being gay or lesbian is a sin, and we will
go to hell for it, but this is how I look at it... God makes everyone
right? God made me, God made you, God made and continues to make
everyone. Therefore if God made me gay, because this isn't some DECISION
that I made up one day, then this is how I am suppose to live, and die;
and I am proud to be gay.”
There's sometimes nothing you can
say that will change some people - try not to let it get to you too
much. And if people in your area are making life difficult for you, try
to just stick with any friends who are on your side. You don't have to
stay in the area when you're older - there are many parts of the world
that are much more tolerant.
2] Dealing with Homosexual:
1. Use religion carefully
When it comes to accepting gay people it seems as though it is the hard
line religious people that have the hardest time. learn about religion
and spirituality from someone who has developed the qualities of love,
compassion and wisdom and NOT someone who only has a good scriptural
knowledge.
2. Realize they are still the same person
Your
gay friend is still your friend. Your gay son is still your son. They
are still the same person you loved for all those years, shared those
memories with and relied on in times of hardship. The fact that they
have revealed their sexuality to you does not mean they love you any
less or that they have become a strange and different person.
3. Understand your fear
Being afraid is okay. It is natural to experience some fear at things
we don’t understand. But choosing to be angry instead of dealing with
our own problem is incorrect. It will never solve the issue. It will
only make matters worse. When you are afraid of something you need to
find out why and then address the problem. The same is true of this
issue. Find out where your fear comes from and then find realistic steps
to solving it.
4. Switch your perspective
Here is an
example. Close your eyes and imagine the whole world was gay. Your
parents are gay, your brothers and sisters are gay – gay is the normal.
Now imagine that you are attracted to a member of the opposite sex and
you know that everyone else is going to consider this to be dirty,
sinful or shameful. You are the odd one out. Imagine the knots that
develop in your stomach and the tightness that you feel in your throat
because you are so stressed about “coming out”. How does that feel?
Now take it one step further and imagine that you tell your parents
that you are a hetero and they react badly. Your own parents, the people
who love you no matter what, tell you that you are disgusting. How does
it make you feel? Not nice.
However you feel about homosexuality,
you owe it to your friend to separate that issue from the homosexual. Do
you understand that? If you don’t like homosexuality it doesn’t mean
you can’t like the homosexual. I don’t like smoking but I still like my
friends who smoke. I don’t like anger but I still like my friends who
get angry. Try shifting your perspective and see what you can come up
with.
Conclusion:
Gay people are people. They deserve
the same respect that anyone else deserves. In my opinion, if we start
being biased towards gays we may as well start buying slaves again. It
is the same thing. Look at your fear, open your mind and use your
religion to find a way to reach acceptance – NOT HATE.
- Akash Oberoi
Dealing With Homosexuality : Sachin Jai
An article About : Dealing with Homosexuality
INTRO
HOMOSEXUALITY is the persistent sexual and emotional attraction to
someone of the same sex. It is part of the range of sexual expression.
Many gay and lesbian individuals first become aware of and experience
their homosexual thoughts and feelings during childhood and adolescence.
Homosexuality has existed throughout history and across cultures.
Recent changes in society's attitude toward homosexuality have helped
some gay and lesbian teens feel more comfortable with their sexual
orientation. In other aspects of their development, they are similar to
heterosexual youngsters. They experience the same kinds of stress,
struggles, and tasks during adolescence.
How Do We Dealt With It .....???
Parents need to clearly understand that homosexual orientation is
not a mental disorder. The causes of homosexuality are not fully
understood. However, a person's sexual orientation is not a matter of
choice.Despite increased knowledge and information about being gay or
lesbian, teens still have many concerns.
These include:
* feeling different from peers;
* feeling guilty about their sexual orientation;
* worrying about the response from their families and loved ones;
* worrying about AIDS, HIV infection, and other sexually transmitted diseases;
It is important for parents to understand their teen's
homosexual orientation and to provide emotional support because they
became socially isolated .Wihdraw from activities and friends how
trouble concentrating and devlop low selfesteem. They may Also devlop
Depression. parents and other needs to alert to this science of
distraced because recent studies shows that gay and lesbian younth
account for a significant numver of daths by sucide in adolescence.
Parents and other family members may gain understanding and
support from organizations such as Parents, Families and Friends of
Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG).
2nd July 2009 is biggest
rememorable day in Indian History with One sweeping judgement the
indian high court determinalized homosexuality shook off stubborn piece
of colonial baggage and may have added momenturm to a broader regional
movement for gay rights, "THIS IS A HUGE STAGE FOR WORD" phrase anjali
gopalan Director of the NAZ Foundation India Trust. An advocacy group
based in New Delhi that sucessfully brought a public interest petition
to overturn india's anti-sodomy law,section 377 of the IPC "WE CAN NOW
TAKE THE NEXT STEP FORWARD FOR THE COMMUNITY IN SECURING OUR RIGHTS "
In the Court's decision chieif justice A.P.SHAH & S.Murlidhar
determined the section 377,as it pertain to confensual sex among people
above 18 years of age in violation of major parts of India's
Constitution.
Conclusion
In short We Proud To be a
Homosexual why we have shame,guilty and nervousness, why we have fear
from the society ultimately we have the same human nature and heart.So,
the government is with us So come and next step to forward.
Love you Gu(a)ys ♥
- Sachin Jai
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